"Eight Years of My Childhood"

A roadmap for young people (and adults) for the journey ahead

This morning, as we reflected on the irony of Martin Luther King Jr. Day and the inauguration of Donald Trump happening simultaneously, my 14 year old son said: “8 years…almost my whole childhood.” He was referring to 8 years of his life under an Administration whose messages and policies are in sharp contrast to the lessons that he has learned from his family, teachers, books, and community: the importance of treating all people with respect and care, regardless of their race, immigration status, gender identity, and faith; of working towards peace and understanding; of learning about science, history, and literature. As news reports indicate, immigration enforcement, restrictions on LGBTQ rights, and the dismantlement of DEI are all on the immediate horizon.

How can young people make sense of the mixed messages in America today? Their classrooms include students and friends from diverse backgrounds, and yet, they experience and bear witness to dehumanizing language and policies about immigrants and LGBTQ community members. On one hand, young children and teenagers can sense the “fierce urgency of now” that Dr. King reminded us to address. And yet, they might not know where or how to start.

I often balance Dr. King’s vital call to action with another reminder from the author of Women Who Run With The Wolves, Clarissa Pinkola Estés: “Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach.” Tending to the “fierce urgency of now” becomes more possible when we anchor ourselves in what we know and where we live, when we play the roles that are in right relationship to our values and skills, and when we do all of this with the people who guide us and build with us.

To support young people (and adults) on their journeys over the next four years, I offer a roadmap below:

· Find Your People: Increasingly in America, we live in what sociologists call “civic deserts” with fewer connections to each other, to organizations, to community. Finding our people – for dialogue, joy, kinship - in real life is a critical way to avoid silos. Creating informal communities to discuss, volunteer, learn, pool resources, celebrate, and protest can deepen our connections with each other. Another way is to learn about and support nonprofit groups and collectives in our local areas who are supporting vulnerable communities. For the young people in our lives, how are they maintaining ties to people in real life? Are there organizational events and gatherings focused on justice and inclusion that we can take them to?

· Channel Your Passion: When a young person asks me how they can become involved in social justice, I ask them to reflect on two questions: What inspires and moves you? And how can you channel that passion outwardly to help others or change an unjust system? Examples for young people abound, from sewing for social justice to interactive gaming to learn about climate change.

· Hone Your Presence: Since the election, a common refrain heard from people (of all ages) is: “I’m going to check out for the next four years because it’s too much.” Creating distance is a coping mechanism that many of us legitimately utilize, but when it becomes our default, it can lead to even more disconnection and discontent. How do we practice returning to the moment, to the issues, to our communities? We can support young people in honing their capacity for presence by helping them bring their attention to a moment, a policy, a piece of news (in an age-appropriate manner); to understand how that moment affects them; and to be curious with them about whether and how to respond.

· Set Your Pace: It’s a long haul, as we all know. We will be exhausted, angry, hopeless, and overwhelmed from time to time (perhaps we already are). Understanding the pace that works for us is an important practice to avoid being reactive and ineffective. And, pace differs depending on the roles we choose to play. In my social change ecosystem framework, for example, the roles of the frontline responder and disrupter often require a different pace (and recovery) than those of caregivers and experimenters. Understanding our roles and our own sustainability needs can help us to effectively pace our actions and responses.

· Use Your Privilege: Beyond simply owning and apologizing for our privileges, what could happen if we use them for the common good? When we blame, discard and ostracize people for their privileges, we lose the potential for collective change. This is especially damaging for young people, who can feel that they have no role to play because of the privileges they hold. Instead, we could think about how our privileges are entry points for disruption and intervention. For example, if we have race, caste, citizenship or class privilege, how can we most effectively channel it? Disrupting stereotypes and biases in conversations, opening doors to our networks, advocating that clubs and associations we are part of take a stand are all ways to use our privileges in order to deepen solidarity.

· Say No to Purity and Perfection: 2025 is the year to abandon purity and perfection. Rather than force people to jump through ideological hoops to prove their purity politics and critique them for not using the perfect analysis, language, and historical context, let’s meet people where they are. So many young people are less likely to join social change movements because of the fear that they don’t know everything or will say the wrong thing. We can support young people by giving them the space to move at their own pace of learning. We can also provide guidance and compassion as they more critically discern what they are hearing on social media platforms, in classrooms, and in their friend groups.

I’d love your thoughts on this roadmap. Please drop a line with your examples, ideas, and reflections!

Book Tour for We Are The Builders!

I’m taking We Are The Builders! to the West Coast in February! Please join me in the Bay Area for any of the events below. Everyone, of all ages, is welcome for a nourishing and affirming conversation about the roles we can play to improve the world around us.

Here’s what else is on my mind this month:

· A new formation called the South Asian American Policy Working Group, a network of groups that addresses policy issues affecting South Asians. Check out @southasianamericancoalition on Instagram.

· The posters from Muslims for Just Futures which are available to print and share with community organizations, centers of worship, and more. Check out bit.ly/ImmigrationKYR.

· Los Angeles fires: I’m sharing links to donate and support from friends here, here and here.

· On lighter notes, I’m a fan of Apple TV’s Severance, and Season 2 is finally here; I’ve been enjoying the podcast too. If you’re into astrology like I am, the transits this year are helpful to understand what’s happening in politics and society too; I use this 2025 Astro Planner from Chani Nicholas each week.

THANK YOU for reading, and for all that you are doing. Please connect me with @deepaviyer on Instagram and subscribe to Throughlines on Substack for more content like this.